I get this saying every single day, "You can't change people". Of course this is absolute criticism, unfortunately this is not the case for everybody. Living with Aspergers and hearing loss, should I change the way my disabilities act? The negative side of this perspective is not accepting myself who I am.
So, what about other people around me? Every day I struggle reading situations socially, emotionally and communicating because the society is too complicated to analyse. At nearly 28 years old, after 7 years since I started writing blogs trying to raise awareness that help people that I can't change who I am. You cannot ask someone with Cerebral Palsy who have leg defunction to stand up and walk 'properly'. This is where people don't understand the aspect of the disability.
I misread social cues, body language and conceptions every single day. It because my Autism structures the wiring process in my brain by how it functions. I still can read, speak, drive a car, sleep well, cook and eat food, lead groups and make friends just like everyone can. This is biggest misconception from mainstream society and media portray stereotypes, feeding misinformation and creating barriers. For many years I faced a lot of harassment, bullies, feeling socially isolated and disconnected from the rest of the world.
I tend to be emotionally stressed due to making a lot of efforts, in mirror of how people without Aspergers try to make friends, find relationships and connections. This is HARDEST thing to experience. It is absolutely HARDEST to be a person rather than being 'normal' able bodied, white and socially privileged with high status.
There are lot of stereotypes and stigma against young adults with Aspergers because of how society and media portray, despite lack of education and awareness it not creating a healthy environment for people like me. The root causes of mental health, which can become a disability is stigma, harassment, consistent bullying and prejudice from others. The lack of accessibility nor inclusive the communities is the segregation and psychologically stigmatising the identity.
In an ordinary day how you react to the person who is homeless asking for your help compared to a person wearing a business suit. The society is filled with hate, wars, violence & crimes, and stereotypes. Misinformation and misconceiving identities can psychologically effect the person living with these experiences. It put you into a lot of pressure trying to find out who you are, and also finding the right people to hang out with.
So the question is "should people change because of them?". Yes, ABSOLUTELY. Psychologists and experts always try to tell you that must relearn your behaviour how to communicate and interact people. It nothing to do with your identity nor who you are as a person (i.e. political, belief, gender....). It about behaviour, respect and forgiveness. You don't have to be friends with everybody but still give them time and respect.
Although, I am yet to find right people in my life. I always dreamed of having a small solid group of friends, a girlfriend/wife and a job (I am running a company now so that dream checklist is ticked!). You cannot block people dreams because of they actively seeking attention due to their compassion. It very difficult when the generation living on social media, having identity wars and political disbelief.
I love to hear from you by placing non-passive thoughts on standing up myself for people to change.
