Are you talking to me or....?

It has been five days since my last post. Meanwhile I have been thinking about forms of communication. Are you talking to me or?

Making conversations is quite difficult for me. I usually speak out the basics like greeting words, 'how are you?', 'what you have been doing?'...and so on etc. After that, it seems like a dead end. I could say something more. Worthwhile, its seems that an able-bodied person couldn't continue to talk with me after that. Not many people seem confident in front of me. Why? Maybe that I have a hearing loss? I aware that it could spoil their mood if I didn't understand what they were saying when they are conversing excitedly.

Over years when I was at University and travelling to the US. Lot of people whose I met tend to get frustrated after a couple of times when I didn't get to understand what they say. Their reaction become rude; judging me who I am and then giving up talking to me forever. Indeed, she/he isn't a friend with the reaction like that?! BUT remember that it happens from you too if you are reading this blog!

I tend to upset about this because I couldn't do anything to improve myself to understand people speeches and body language. Like an automation. I don't have a solution. You cannot expect me to solve this crisis on my own since it is a non cureable disability? The BIG problem is YOU. That is how I become upset and frustrated reflecting from your reactions. Family and close friends does a same thing as well; they are more like not conversing with me much as other family members. I tend to miss more than 75% of the information if the third person intitate the conversation between all of us.

Can I just say 'sorry can you repeat that?' and/or 'what we are talking about?' in repetitive ways? Yes I can, but I always experienced that able-bodied person's reaction became off-putting because it kept delaying their conversation. This is an attitude problem. You can tell what is the difference between a deaf and hearing person? On other mind, it usually a new person whom I just met always talks to me more than others in same room just until she/he realised that I am an Aspie and have a hearing loss. The conversation fades out. Why? You can't expect me to dominate the conversation because everyone speaks out of pace. Most Aspies (especially hearing ones) have similar problem as well. We couldn't keep up talking because we have learning issues while we were younger. We didn't get along with language skills.

How you can improve on this issue? Communication is important key for partnership, businesses, relationships and friendships. Does this social rule says depending on what circumstances? It does not say depending on what kind of person's form of communication, disability, ethnicity or race etc. Far too many people I met so far in my life are terribly lazy at communicating. They seem very conservative about it. If this attitude problem keeps up; can I keep standing in same world forever and let the problem solve itself? Able-bodied people are RESPONSIBLE to make this work because they are very capable to communicate all forms of languages, unlike a deaf person who just do sign language.

If you feel like having a conversation with someone. Just be aware of what kind of communication challenge you expect from the person. Be pleasing. Non judgmental. Be aware, and encouraging. We are not different after all if everyone is understandable!